here we are
waiting in the computer
the blue walls are a solace
you smile you laugh
Im uncomfortable
it hurts
your smile is so much
like your sisters
and yet you are
grace and poise
your hair is a million
blonder than yonder
I feel a chemistry
of unease
a strong feeling
that defies
definition
and embraces
ambiguity
you havent changed
since matteson
only taller
and fuller
and tanner
and brilliant
extremity is
not you
a gentle breeze
on a lonely beach
a black swimsuit
thats wet like
the strands of
your hair
someone hates me
and Im culturally
inappropriate
is what your sister
always said
its so fucking
uncanny after
seeing my
counsellor
on my last day
at ace
here you are
all smiles
but fluttering
like a heart thats
bing bong
now i need
to see you
reassurance
is a strange
word
why would i
want to
change you
its the small
world that you
live in
even psychologists
are human
and small-minded
the game is
played with a
kiwi hand
a blinkiong
light to warn
us of cops
on desert roads
yes women are
pioneers
and have fought
maori attention
for generation
yes women can
be lesbians
and shred guys
to pieces
and your blank
blue eyes
crave fear
and see nothing
as i visit
this place
for the last
time in this
life
hopeless
tired
fighting alone
lets just get up
and get over
your sister
taking pills
and you feign
no knowledge
of my presence
when you stare
from the side
of your eyes
